Great Walls: How to End the Government Shutdown

As the government shutdown continues through the end of the year over the sticky issue of President Trump’s border wall, both sides ignore several great solutions to the disagreement that will satisfy everyone involved:

  1. Inform President Trump that China’s Great Wall has a toboggan (no, really, it does!). Not to be outdone by the Chinese, Trump will install escalators and a monorail on his wall. Crossing the border will become America’s greatest theme park! (Sorry, King’s Dominion, Virginia).
  2. Let President Trump know that Berlin is no longer using their wall and that we could probably get it at a discount (some reassembly required).
  3. Explain to President Trump and his supporters that Game of Thrones is not a documentary, and that Mexicans and Guatemalans are not White Walkers looking to overrun America.
  4. Explain to President Trump and his supporters that Game of Thrones is a documentary, and that Mexicans and Guatemalans are White Walkers and, thus, white. Slap some MAGA hats on them, and they’ll be welcomed right in.
  5. Convince President Trump that walls are boring. The best rulers have Sphinxes.

Leave a Reply